Wednesday, June 29, 2011

8 months old

Sweet Sweet Jamesie,
I cannot believe that you are 8 months old. It seems like yesterday I found out that you were going to exist! I remember the day your Daddy and I found out about you- it was Valentine's Day 2010. How appropriate that day is now, as you have shown us what it truly means to love. The moment I found out that you were you, I loved you. I was absolutely scared- about 6 months before Mommy had been pregnant with another baby but we lost that baby very early in utero. I desperately wanted to be able to see your sweet face. How could I have ever guessed how absolutely precious that face is? One of the first things I said to you after you were born was "How did Mommy get to so lucky to get the best baby in the world?" Those words have been true every second, every minute, every day of the last 8 months.

We called you "Bean" for the first 20 weeks in my belly because that's what you looked like the first time we saw you! Even as you grew, the name stuck until we found out that you were James! Mommy was the only one who guessed you were a boy, and I was right! You have had so many nicknames over the last 8 months. We called you "Baby Bird" because everytime it was time to eat you cocked your head and opened your mouth! I never guess that I would still be nursing 8 months later- but you it. You love it so much that you refuse to take a bottle!

We also call you "Baby Bear" because of Mommy and Daddy's obsession with all things Baylor. Between the 4 degrees and Mommy working at Baylor for over 3 years, what else could we call you? And finally, we love to call you "Jamesie the Giraffe". There is a Raffi song called "Joshua Giraffe" that Mommy listened to when she was little. For some reason it has just stuck! Now we sing "Jamesie the Giraffe" to you all the time. And although you are a giraffe, you will always be the King of our Jungle!

I felt like my life finally made sense the moment you were born. I finally knew my true calling. It was like Heaven opened and God told me my purpose was to be your Mommy and raise you to love the Lord. I knew you were destined for greatness. You have these piercing eyes that seem so much wiser. I thought that as a newborn you were so much more alert than the other newborns. They were napping for hours and you were taking 30 minute cat naps a few times a day!

They say that when you have a child, it's like you are allowing your heart to travel outside of your body for the rest of eternity. Baby boy, you not only have my heart, but every fiber in my body. Because of you, I am forever changed.

James, you are so Special. I don't know how else to explain it. I truly believe that God is using you to minister to so many people. Hundreds of people are praying for you. Maybe thousands. I have no idea. But I do know that you are the most Special little boy. When you were 5 and a half months old, you and Mommy were shopping at Central Market (like Whole Foods). I was checking out and you were sitting up in the seat. I turned around and a lady had picked you up out of the shopping cart and she was holding you! I tried, very calmly, to ask her to give me back my baby. She explained that she was a grandmother and just "had to hold you!" At the time I was so scared. Looking back, I understand her. I have the opportunity to hold you every day. If I saw you, I would naturally open my arms to take you in. You are that special.

Jamesie, I cannot wait to see what the next 8 months, 8 years, and 8 decades have in store for you. I think about the blessing you have been to so many people at 8 months old, and I cannot fathom what the future will be like. I know in about 4 years you might want to go to the store dressed in your Batman cape and Dinosaur slippers. I promise to laugh and encourage you to be yourself. I know that in about 12 years you will be mad at me that I will not allow you to play football (or any other contact sport for that matter!). Please know that it is my desperate love for you and not out of any "meanness" as a Mommy! And in about 30 years you will marry the love of your life. Know that I have been praying for that special woman since the day you were born. I promise to be an encourager of your love, and will gladly let her become the most important woman in your life.

But remember this:
I'll love you forever.
I'll like you for always.
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

I love you sweet boy.

5 comments:

  1. Kara - How sweet. This gave me chills! You are such an amazing women and James is SO lucky and blessed to have you as his mom!

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  2. What a wonderful post written with such love. My family is praying for a speedy recovery for Jamesie.

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  3. This is a beautiful post to your little boy, Kara! He is SO blessed to have you as his mommy!!

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  4. I found your story from Glamorous Newlywed and my heart just aches for you. That little boy is precious beyond belief and I'm sending tons of good vibes and best wishes for you all. That quote is the BEST - love that book!

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  5. I was nervous about re-reading this post. It reminds me of a time with more hope. I was not wrong to be nervous.

    Caroline: Kara is an amazing mother. We were lucky to have him.

    Tracy: Thank you for your prayers.

    Jessica: James was blessed in his own way.

    Dublas: It's a great book, and every word true.

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